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Verfasser: Hexe
Datum: Donnerstag, den 10. Juni 2004, um 0:51 Uhr
Betrifft: Sich für homosexuelle Angehörige schämen!

Hi Folks,

den folgenden Beitrag fand ich auf der Seite von Eric:

Mormon Church Magazine Feb. 2004 - "Children Who Stray"
Subjekt: Article in Feb 2004 has my blood BOILING re: Children Who Stay
Date: Jan 30 15:45 2004
Author: Empoweerded (Note: Ensign is the official Mormon church magazine for adults)

„My well-intentioned neighbors gave my girls and I subscriptions to all the church magazines. Usually they go right from the mailbox to the garbage can. For some reason, I had to open this Ensign (Feb 2004), and now I know why I left the Mormon church.
This woman chose to remain anonymous. Good thing...I would have hunted her down! The title is "I Won’t Give Up on Them!" and is subtitled, "How could I maintain a close, loving relationship with my children when they had rejected the standards of the Church?" GAG! But it gets MUCH WORSE. Seriously, you must read this to believe the judgmental, condescending attitude this woman (and many who think they have the truth) has!
She seems to be totally shocked that her "prodigal" children are actually loving and "work hard at honoring her", that they are "responsible, productive people who manifest the basic values of Christian charity and honesty." She says this as if these qualities can only exist in people WITHIN the "Church." She actually admits to missing them and wanting to be part of their lives but, at the same time, relieved at not always having to participate in their lives!
The part that sickened me most was when she was visiting one her daughters, who invited her to go to an amusement park. It was SUNDAY, so perfect mom declined and chose to go to church instead...in her "daughter’s ward." This woman actually had the GALL to bear her testimony and this is some of what she said (WARNING: You may vomit!) ""Brothers and Sisters, I am here visiting my daughter, who SHOULD (emphasis added) be a member of your ward but has not been inside a chapel for many years. In fact, three of my four children have fallen away from the Church. (Here goes...) I want to APOLOGIZE to you GOOD people on behalf of my children. (OMG! It gets worse)...I suspect that you have seen them as you walked down these streets, and I am sorry if their behavior has offended you." WHO THE HELL does this woman think she is and what RIGHT does she have to stand up in front of these complete strangers and apologize on BEHALF of her children? (OH...and BTW...I got the impression from an earlier paragraph that one of her daughters has a "female partner"...it didn’t elaborate).
There is much more of this CRAP (trying to be nice) but what REALLY irks me is that the "CHURCH" published this CRAP and BELIEVES this type of behavior and attitude toward others is ACCEPTABLE and even RESPECTED!!! The other thing I noticed is not once did it say anything about leaving the "gospel"...it was always the "church."
I seriously need to send a letter to the Ensign and tell them what mindless drivel this article is. If you get a chance to read this, you may also pick up the fact that this woman uses a LOT of "victim language"...the "shoulds" and that she is a martyr ("It is painful to remember the dreams I used to have for them. But I don’t want to torment them or me with my disappointment, so I work hard at living my life in the present instead of the past.") HELLO! Try living YOUR life for YOU instead of someone else.
Well, this isn’t all...but I’ve ranted long enough. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest!
Any thoughts????“

Effulgent schrieb dazu:

“The issue I had with the article is that the woman finally admits, about 2/3 of the way down, that her husband left her because he was gay and that her daughter is a lesbian and has a partner. She kept calling it a "lifestyle" as if it was a conscious choice and a sin.
My mother doesn’t approve of all of the aspects of my lifestyle or my brother’s lifestyle. We don’t go to church, we drink sometimes, that kind of thing. But she feels blessed that she has children and she loves us very much. She has never been ashamed of us, even when we were doing things that were extremely stressful on us.
How horrible it must be for this woman’s daughter to think that her mother is that ashamed of her. How horrible it must be for the gay man to think that his daughter’s mother thinks that he is to blame for the fact that the daughter is gay. What negativity and shame and sadness must abound in this family that could be relieved if only the mother would just be loving and accepting of the daughter as she is.

EDIT:
Something else that sunk in after a while is how she talked about having the perfect life ("As a young woman, I was an achiever—a straight-A student, product of a strong Latter-day Saint family. I suppose I saw myself as a valiant spirit on the fast track to the celestial kingdom."). Then all of a sudden her life starts to suck ("But after I married and had children, divorce temporarily derailed my journey. Now, instead of speeding along smoothly toward success, I have spent years painstakingly trying to rebuild my track one tie, one step, at a time.")
It must really suck to have to be a member of a religion that tells you that your eternal happiness has been f’ed up because you had a failed marriage and your children were born with a different sexual orientation than your church allows.”

Wiseddrop meinte dazu:

„Unbeliveable!!!!! How pathetic!!!!!! Warped!!!!!!!!
She quoted from Nephi - If he [the wayward soul] repent not he shall not be numbered among my people, that he may not destroy my people, for behold I know my sheep, and they are numbered.
What kind of sadistic - guilt - shame - threat is this? Old joe knew how to manipulate people - didn’t he.
I loved the part where she talked about polluting herself through association.
This shows the power the cult has over people - especially those so far out of touch with reality.
I hate moronism and everything it teaches.”

Und justmythougts schrieb dazu:

„I read the story written in the February 2004 issue, titled "I Won’t Give Up On Them" written with the name of the author withheld. After reading it, I felt compelled to respond in writing.
I am most surprised that The Church would print such an article, as well as promote its contents with an exercise of sharing it within a family to spark dialogue. This article is wrought with a woman who suffers greatly from a martyr complex, guilt, and shame, based on what she interprets the church teaches. I could write a novel alone on the words of this woman, but due to time and space constraints I address the following key point which are found throughout the entire article
·      The church has taught this woman that being an over achiever and living her life with the ’appearance of perfection’ would keep her safe from the world around her. This message seems to be mainstream among members and because of it, they suffer unnecessarily with constant guilt, as life and living are not ’perfect’, never have been and never will be. If it were, there would be no reason for our existence upon this earth.
·      She speaks of the success and happiness of her children and the deep love they have for her, but this is not enough. They must be ’like’ her in order to gain her total acceptance. Anything less, they will continue to fall short in her eyes. This is a very dangerous message. Jesus Christ taught us to ’love unconditionally’. In the pureness of love there are no conditions. As a parent who loves and nurtures their children unconditionally, love is not a ’responsibility’. Love is a privilege to give and to receive. It is a gift, not a burden.
·      Her position on homosexuality and her definition of ’apostate’ which has been born and encouraged by The Church, is also dangerous. It forces men and women to engage in ’false’ relationships, resulting in marriage and innocent children born of these relationships that would not otherwise take place if were not for the extreme religious pressures to conform and deny the way they were born. She is a true victim in this regard, but not by her husband, but of the doctrine that he was taught. We are people, not labels ... we all are individually unique ... children of God, made in His image ... there are no mistakes. In essence, it denies the individual spirit of a person to be themselves. Because of this, spouses and children are hurt in the aftermath of full acceptance of identity. Judgement and labels are imposed where none belongs. It is not our place to judge others.
·      This writer speaks of being on the ’fast track’ to the Celestial Kingdom. This above all else speaks throughout this article, even though the writer denies it in the end. When a parent or member lives their life to die, it really isn’t living. What so many people do, is miss the wonders and joy of this life, thinking that their actions or lack of them are preparing them for the next. How very sad this is to me. They are only seeing a fraction of the picture instead of all of it, in the beauty of the wholeness.
·      The writer makes mention of the "Fourth Article of Faith", however, shows clear lack of knowledge to understand the "Eleventh Article of Faith" which states "We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may." If this mother embraced this Article of Faith, there would be no need for her to suffer as a self imposed victim because her children chose another path in this life, other than the one she deems proper for them. Spirituality comes from within, and each journey is individual and different. The path she is on, may be the one she requires to cope in this life, as well as the path her children are on, may be the path they require for their spiritual growth. Both are right ... just different. One does not trump the other!
·      As parents, we are to bring our children up in righteousness. To teach them right from wrong to live by the "Golden Rule". We all have our free agency and any attempts to try and eradicate that agency would be detrimental to our spirit as well as to those we are trying to control. Her attempts to ’apologize’ in a Fast and Testimony meeting for her children’s choices, I found totally obscene. In doing so, she attempted to not only control their agency, but make a public apology because her children did not fit into her mold of who she thought they should be.
·      Her "Three Lessons" are pure until she attempts to put meaning behind them. In doing so she again attempts to control and negate the free agency of others and bastardizes them until they hold no real value.
Love the sinner, not the sin. Love with judgement is not pure love. Christ did not teach us to love as this writer has outlined in this article which is being promoted by the Church by publishing it. Possibly if she had quoted from the bible as Christ taught, she might have had a better understanding of the unrighteousness of her behavior and thought. With her article, it sends a very mixed message to its readers. It is wrought with hateful, self loathing and judgmental comments towards those she professes to love. How sad.
Family ... isn’t it about time?
Possibly if she had invested her time with family and spent her day with her daughter, loving her, bonding with her, nurturing and letting her know how much she appreciated her, instead of tearing her and her other children down behind their backs in a Fast and Testimony meeting with total strangers, her life would be much more fulfilling.
Somehow, I think Christ was there with her daughter on that Sabbath day. Too bad her mother wasn’t!
Signed,
justmythoughts
Quelle. Recovery from Mormonism: Message Board

Ich meine dazu:

Bei den Mormonen gibt es die „Tradition“, das alle, die „nicht für sie (die Kirche) sind“, ausgegrenzt werden, um sie so wieder „zurück zur Herde“ zu bringen!
Ich nenne das „Psychoterror“, weil jedes Kind sich nach der Liebe der Eltern sehnt, und wenn ein Kind den Weg der Eltern nicht mitgehen kann oder will, und dann mit Liebesentzug „diszipliniert“ werden soll, dann frage ich mich, wie es denn kommt, das so viele, besonders homosexuelle Jugendliche in dieser „Kirche“, sich das Leben nehmen oder einen lebenslangen psychischen Schaden haben, wenn diese „Kirche“ doch angeblich so „gut für alle Menschen ist?
Direkt auf das eigentliche Thema bezogen, meine ich, das eine Mutter/ein Vater/ein Verwandter oder Freund, der einen Menschen ablehnt; und sich seinetwegen/ihretwegen „schämt“, weil seine/ihre Kirche das sie/ihn so gelehrt hat, die eigentliche christliche Botschaft ganz aus den Augen (Dank der ständigen Indoktrination der Mormonen) verloren haben, die da lautet: Liebet euren Nächsten wie euch selbst!
Da steht nicht: „Außer sie sind Feministinnen, Lesben, Schwule, Kirchenkritiker“, sondern diese Liebe wird als bedingungslos angesehen!
Ich denke, diese Mutter und ehemalige Ehefrau eines schwulen Mannes hat zwei Probleme:

1.      Sie hat Angst, weil sie nicht ohne einen Mann in die cel. Herrlichkeit kommt. Und das ihr Mann sie vielleicht nur als Alibi geheiratet hat (das kratzt sehr am eigenen Selbstbild).

2.      Sie glaubt, das ihre Tochter so wie sie leben sollte: Heiraten (einen Mann natürlich), viele Kinder bekommen, Antidepressiva und anderes Zeug schlucken, und ihrem Mann und ihren Kindern immer dienen. Ihre Tochter hat aber einen anderen Weg für sich gewählt, was sie nicht verstehen kann.

Ich glaube, das erst, wenn sie sich von dieser „Kirche“ verabschiedet hat (zumindest emotional), wird sie bereit sein, ihre Tochter so zu lieben und anzunehmen, wie sie ist!
Denn ihre Tochter wird sie immer lieben!
So, wie ich meine Schwester, die genauso denkt!
Die denkt, das alle Lesben und Schwule krank sind, und durch eine "Therapie" wieder geheilt werden könnten!
Echt krank!
Wie schlug doch jemand in diesem Forum vor. Den Artikel aus dem Ensign auszudrucken, ihn auf der Toilette aufzuhängen und lesen, und dann herunterzuspunterspülen. Ich finde, das diese Blätter noch vorher "benutzt" werden sollten! Oder?

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